If you want to pay-off debt and build wealth all you need to do is learn one simple two-letter word.
You need to learn to say, “N-O”!
One of the best disciplines (and hardest to develop) for paying off debt and building wealth is having the self discipline (self control) to say no to unneeded purchases. This is a discipline that I have struggled with over the years and has often impeded progress to our financial goals.
I love to find bargains! eBay, Craigslist, Pawn Shops, Thrift-Stores, Garage Sales all of these are excellent places to score a great deal. I pride myself in my ability to find bargains. I love to do the research then go on the hunt for a great buy.
Over the years this, “ability” has been an asset to our family. We rarely pay retail and buying lightly used bargains has saved our family some serious coin. On the other hand this, “ability” has also slowed our progress in eliminating our debt.
Often times, “deals” come at inopportune times…sometimes I stumble upon a deal that just can’t be passed up – but the budget doesn’t agree.
When I find one of these deals my mind begins to turn thinking of the different, “creative” ways to make the purchase happen. Creative solutions like rearranging the budget, selling stuff, offering a trade or borrowing from future allowance funds.
Unfortunately all to often these great deals are squeezed into the budget at the expense of something else. (This is one reason our debt snowball took longer than expected)
I think I have always known (at least on an intellectual level) the importance of being able to say no and walk away from a deal. But deals are not entirely intellectual – they are also emotional. Emotions have a way of skewing reality and clouding our intellect. So I have rarely said no.
Until one day…
I randomly stopped by a Pawn Shop – not shopping for anything in particular and out of the corner of my eye I saw a SWEET Specialized Mountain Bike. After walking over and inspecting it my heart began to race…for you bike pep’s out there it was a:
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Specialized S-Works FSR
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Full XTR Components
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TIME Carbon Pedals
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Rockshox SID Front Fork
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Fox Float Rear Fork
It probably retailed for $2000+. My present bike is a nice Schwinn Homegrown Hardtail (when Yeti made High End Schwinns). The Homegrown is a great bike and functions perfectly. But… this Specialized was newer, full suspension and would have been a welcomed upgrade.
I took the bike out for a spin and it rode like a dream. As I blasted over curbs the front and rear shocks reacted and I could barely tell the bumps were there. The shifting was so smooth and riding it was pure joy. I could see myself shredding the local trails on this black beauty.
I sat outside the Pawn Shop thinking how I could make this deal happen. How much I could negotiate off the purchase price, how much I could sell my bike for and other creative solutions. I called Shae (my voice of reason) and told her about this incredible find. She is not as emotional about these things as I am (and she is incredibly good at saying no) and simply replied, “sounds like a great bike. Where is the money going to come from?”
As I began to give her my creative plan I saw all the holes in my reasoning. All the if’s and when’s made paying for this bike as planned about as likely as the lottery. As I tried to sell my wife on the idea I began to hear my silly emotions over this purchase.
This glimpse of reason came from spending the previous 12-months planning and saving. We had just sold the majority of our possessions. We had made some drastic decision to sacrifice comfort and possessions for meaningful time with loved ones.
Shae had quit her job and with it we left a steady paycheck, retirement matching and health insurance. Over the next 6-months our income was fixed and we would be living on savings as we grew our businesses. We had planned and saved for the months ahead and nowhere in the plan was an expensive new toy.
Standing at the Pawn Shop looking at my dream bike I came to the harsh realization that I was almost willing to jeopardize my families financial security over a two-wheeled-toy.
I wheeled the bike inside and said, “No”.
Every purchase has a cost. Sometimes this cost goes far beyond the price tag. I am slowly learning the fine art of saying, “No” and with this comes beautiful opportunities.
What about you? What have you said no to? What do you need to say no to? I would love to hear your thoughts — please share below! Lets develop our, “N-O” discipline so we can say yes to the things that really matter!
All I have to say is – thank you! thank you! thank you! for writing this post! Oh, how many times have I wanted to tell a loved one “you’ll regret buying that!” but couldn’t because it wasn’t my place. Thank you for sharing your story, I will be sharing the link on my weekend reads post Saturday morning!
Your welcome!
“No” is so hard! Good job, Nick (and Shae). That sounds like a tough one! My no is easiest in avoidance… not going to those places helps so much. So, I no longer browse Target just for fun 🙂
Thanks Trina!
How many of those deals (that just couldn’t be passed up) were found while I was looking just for fun… Avoidance is genius, especially for those that lack the discipline!
Oh Nick…you and I seem to have a similar weak spot of the 2 wheeled variety (I’m also known far and wide as “The Disabled Cyclist”,LOL 😛 ). While I’m more of a nice-steel hardtail and SS (singlespeed) kinda guy…even I would have had a HARD time saying no to that sweet dual squishy had the price been right…I seem to remember a time around 2.25 years ago,when we came into a bit of extra and unexpected cash,I became all secretive and greediy,selfish…I blew every penny of it in one trip to a favorite bike shop (where I build up new a Vassago Jabberwocky AND Bandersnatch,as well as bringing home an Origin 8 CX bike),and the local classifieds because I “NEEDED” that project truck (was pretty nice,but still needed work),a V8 powered S Blazer that drug everywhere we rode it (as if my daily driven and air-bagged S10 wasn’t project enough)…..
I could go back through 21 years of marriage and tell tails of immature behavior with money,and selfish spending,but lets just say I have a VERY loving,patient and forgiving Wife who loves God more than me,and believed Him when He told her “he’ll get better”,LOL! “No” is a hard word to learn and accept,but it’s most definately a word that’s appreciated once you learn to implement it when that urge for impulsive buying hits.
VERY good post,my friend,it brought back lots of memories,both ones that made me laugh at myself,as well as some headslap moments 😛
Thanks Stephen! Praise God for Godly women!
I use to live in your neck of the woods (Cleveland/Chatt)…awesome single track. I would love to visit again in the Fall – love all the colors!
Sounds like you have quit the two wheeled collection!
Thanks for stopping by and keep in touch.
Cheers!
-NICK
I JUST CAME ACROSS YOUR BLOG AND IM SO HAPPY TO HEAR A CHRISTIAN FAMILY DOING WHAT YOUR DOING! MY HUSBAND HAS WORKED FOR 24 YEARS AT A JOB THAT IS LITERALLY AGING HIS BODY SO MUCH, HE CAN HARDLY WALK WHEN HE GETS HOME,: HE WORKS 12 Hour SHIFTS(NIGHT), ANYWAYS OUR DREAM IS TO DO EXACTLY WHAT YOUVE DONE. IVE HAD THIS IDEA FOR so many years, thats why I was so thankful to read all about your journey. I would continue to work, (accounting job). im slso in college n will be done with my associate degree and start bachelor program. I believe if we lived debt free we could make it on
my income. Our main concern is health insurance, because my company plan is so expensive. Any info would be so appreciated! I hope you n your family continue to enjoy your blessings daily.
Keep it up!
If you don’t have any expenses its fairly easy to get by…
Health insurance is costly. We bought a high-deductible plan that basically only covers us for catastrophic things. Then we cover everything else out of pocket. This allows us to buy a HSA plan that has some tax benefits built in. Right now we pay about $360/month just for our premium not including any HSA savings.
Wish you the best in your journey!